Tomorrow, go down to your local travel agent and see if you can book the following trip:  

A return flight to India and a hire car to pick up in Chennai and drop off in Mumbai 2,500kms away (so far so good).  

Ask them to upgrade the vehicle to an auto-rickshaw with a customised paint job, six speaker surround sound system, flip down DVD screen, fridge and disco laser lighting, (travel agent looks puzzled). Then say you actually need 32 similar rickshaws.   

Next, ask if the collision damage waiver includes crashing the rickshaw in to a monsoon flooded ravine and do they know anyone who can perform a skin graft operation at short notice (travel agent looks nervous). Enquire if the breakdown cover includes fixing a broken gearbox with some glue and a 5 rupee coin within the hour because you have a beach party to get to before sunset.

And another thing. If by chance anyone gets arrested for straying on to a naval base can the travel agent negotiate their release? (travel agent breaks in to a cold sweat). Now did I mention we will also need to bribe a few officials to ensure our unhindered passage through several state borders? (travel agent hangs up the "Closed" sign).  

Welcome to Monsoon Madness, the adventure not available in the shops...

Click here for the photo showreel

Click here for the video carnage

The India Auto Rickshaw Challenge