From the desk of Extreme Trifle HQ After the epic failure that was The Wrong Way Round it seems only fitting to go for the double and set off due south for our next adventure, The Wrong Way Down. We don't recommend trying this at home but if you must then you will need the following:
So there we have it. Preparations are under way safe in the knowledge that our chances of conquering the Sahara on mopeds are only slightly less likely than Keith Chegwin scoring the winning goal for England in the World Cup Final. And the chances of us reaching the World Cup Final in South Africa are only slightly less likely than Keith Chegwin scoring the winning goal for Wales, who didn't qualify. A short history of "steppy" powered escapades In 2003 we attempted to deliver pizzas from England to Sicily. After 9 days in the saddle we had only got as far as Rome, and the pizzas were starting to grow mushrooms that we hadn't added. "Pizzas to Palermo" was abandoned before our pizza boxes became a bio-hazard. In 2005 we chopped some steppy's in half and with the aid of some scaffolding and glue made them 8 feet long. The result was probably the worst handling motorcycle of all time. "Cheesy Rider" was born, resulting in a 2,500km trip to the Faro rally in Portugal where we entered what was left of our bikes in the Custom Show. We came an easy last place on every count and thankfully didn't get beaten up by the beardy leather waistcoat brigade. In 2006, "Ring Sting" saw us attempt to break the lap record at the Nurburgring. We did indeed set a new record...for the slowest ever lap at 22 mins 49 seconds. Though to be fair that was in the wet and included a crash. In 2009 we set off on our biggest expedition yet, The Wrong Way Round. An outrageous attempt to ride 18,000kms from England to Siberia to navigate the infamous "Road of Bones". We fell slightly short, about 13,000kms short to be precise due to an slight administrative error in Transnistria, or in the words of their chief prosecutor "illegal entry and trespassing". The Rules In keeping with tradition there will be slack preparation and an over reliance on cables ties and duct tape to see us through. As every pizza delivery boy knows, a steppy doesn't handle properly when it leaves the factory so sticking it in the world's largest sandpit and exceeding its load limit by a factor of ten will be hilarious. Expected difficulty rating This rare 5 Tyre award is in recognition of the ridiculousness of the whole idea. Clearly we haven't thought this one through. which is a good thing, cos' if we did we'd scare ourselves and we're all out of clean pants. Especially after what happened last time...
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