A jolly jaunt around the Mediterranean calling in at all the millionaire's playgrounds and suitably lowering the tone.Departure date TBC.

the wheels

Leading the armada will be The HMS Extreme Trifle - a pirate ship powered by duvet cover sails and a crew that have only ever rowed a dingy 50 metres off shore - in a lake...

the rules

Pirate outfits compulsory. Playing of the pirate national anthem "Captain Pugwash" will also be compulsory when embarking, disembarking and when completely barking...

expected difficulty rating 

Awarded a "Michelin 3 Tyre" difficulty rating due to total lack of sailing experience and a boat that by default will have the repair budget of a lilo...

outcome

Not drowning would be nice                     

YES : I would like to walk the plank and get scurvy >>>            

NO : I will be busy making a selection of chutneys for the village fete